I was reading Misty Mawn's blog , her self-portrait photos are absolutely stunning. I think it is amazing how she captures something of herself, her mood, feelings, and she's taken the photo herself. She appears not to be self conscious. It really amazes me.

I'm almost 38 years old and feeling neither young nor old, kinda in between and nowhere.
I'm not happy about my weight, not that I'm the size of some people that scare me (health wise) when I see them but still I could certainly loose quite a few kilos!!
I'm self-conscious. I hardly ever think that any photo of me is good, and those are usually when someone has taken it in a candid moment without me knowing.
Perhaps I should just take the plunge and take a photo each day, practice, get use to it, the beauty of a digital camera is the erase button...no-one ever has to see. Courage, I await thee!

Misty Mawn's paintings are also stunning and again she manages to capture something within them, a mood, a feeling, there's just something that seems to speak to you. A friend of mine, Megan, actually purchased one of her paintings, this one, and I was able to see it for real not just on a computer screen. Yes, it was more stunning and amazing in life.

Something else stunning I saw on another blog was this stunning painting by Anahata Katkin. I can't seem to get it out of my head. There is something about it that has touched something in me and I can't honestly say what it is, only that I think it is amazing...and the eyes! It's one of those paintings that I would LOVE to see 'in the flesh', for real......but it is probaby for the best that I can't as I would probably end up buying it!!!

At the moment, seeing other peoples work, those that really move me, are both an inspiration and a deflator. I get an urge to want to create that same piece of art but I know that I do not really want to copy it, what I really want is to create pieces that can do to others what these pieces have done to me - moved me, touched me etc.... but I get overwhelmed and feel a sense of failure before I begin. why Why WHY do we do this to ourselves?! I know, again, it is just a matter of practice & patience, allowing our own skills and style to develop over time. I am learning to walk when I really want to run, and run really fast!!

Comments

[Lysh]

Aha! Ursula has admitted vulnerability and a sense of apprehension when painting at least to the blog world. I will carefully store away this piece of information to know that someone who has such talent and gusto also doubts herself at times. It is sad in a way to take solace in someone else's self-doubt but it is beautiful because it is a reminder that we are all human and confidence in art is rarer than people think.

[megan]

A wise friend once told me when I was doubting my own artistic ability once,
that "other people's opinions are none of my business" - and whilst this doesn't solve the dilemma we are often faced with as artists trying to find our thing, maybe we sometimes need to exercise less judgement on ourselves. Art is always an ongoing journey - one that we sometimes know the direction of and one that sometimes needs extra exploration. Often we need to try lots of paths to get to where we want and on the way we see some discover something amazing. If not, we kepp on travalling that journey.
Mxx